Bah Humbug or ’tis the season?

The shops have been full of seasonal foods, homeware and gifts for weeks now. Those adverts — both the ones we’ve grown up with and the glossy new contenders — are starting to dominate the TV. Some radio stations have quietly shifted their playlists. And there’s even a UK channel that has been showing holiday movies for over a month already. Most town centres have switched on their illuminations. The weather forecasts are hinting at a cold snap, my dogs are snoozing by the fire, and it’s getting dark much too early for my liking.

Love it, hate it, or sit somewhere in-between, it’s almost impossible to avoid the reminders of the calendar countdown. And I’m still going to try to write this without using that word — we’re still in November, and it’s far too early in the year for me to commit to it fully.

I’m not posting this to add to the holiday “hype”. What I am hoping to do is to normalise whatever your attitude to this time of year happens to be. If you’re what I think of — affectionately — as a “fan”, and you want to start wearing fair-isle jumpers, planning menus and get-togethers, watching movie marathons, or sorting out your gifts, that’s great. If you’re right at the other end of the spectrum and this season fills you with dread, or feels isolating, sad, overwhelming, or even jealousy-provoking, that’s normal as well. And I promise you won’t be the only one. If you’re somewhere in-between, that’s probably the most typical reaction of all.But I want to sit with this a little longer, because late November can be a difficult place to stand. The season is “starting”, but it hasn’t officially arrived. There’s a sense that we’re supposed to feel something particular, yet many of us don’t — or we feel too much — or we feel several conflicting things at once. It can be disorientating. The expectations start early, long before we’ve had the chance to catch our breath.

For some, that early noise is exciting. For others, it’s uncomfortable pressure. And for many, it’s simply one more thing to manage in an already busy, emotionally complex life.

I want to give you permission — if you don’t already feel like you have it — to let your response be whatever it is. You don’t need to match anyone else. You don’t need to feel what the adverts, decorations or playlists imply you “should” be feeling. You are allowed to simply be where you are.

I’m going to post some tips in early December for those who find this time of year difficult, but for now I want to say this clearly: however you feel about the season, you truly are not the only one. And however you feel right now is valid.

If you find this time joyful, exciting, or even gleeful, then embrace that — gently. Notice the things that nurture you: family, friends, those jumpers you’ve been waiting to wear, music, familiar films, or even cold dog walks that bring a strange kind of peace. Try to grab a few mindful moments where you take in that warmth. Think of them as little deposits in your mental health “piggy bank” — moments you can draw on later when things feel busier, heavier, or less predictable.

If that’s not you, please don’t feel you have to pretend. Talking to someone you trust can make a real difference — and I think you might be surprised by how many people quietly feel the same. A friend, a colleague, even a neighbour may be far more understanding than you expect. Could you meet them for a coffee somewhere that isn’t insisting on spiced lattes and loud seasonal soundtracks? Could you share even a tiny piece of what’s weighing on you?

If talking feels difficult, there are still ways to care for yourself. Find activities that you enjoy and can do mindfully — crafts, time outside, reading, cooking something simple, or setting aside a moment just for you. These aren’t small things. These are also deposits in your “mental health piggy bank”, and they count just as much.

This time of year can bring out both tenderness and tension. It can amplify joy or amplify discomfort. It can highlight connection or highlight loneliness. None of this means you’re doing anything wrong. It simply means you’re human, responding to a season that carries a lot of emotional weight in different ways for different people.

Festive, frazzled, or halfway? ’tis the season however you feel about it —
perhaps with a little more time, space, and kindness for yourself,
and a few mindful deposits in your mental health piggy bank.